Tag Archives: seizure

I am very nervous about my appointment with my doctor tomorrow

Greetings, readers. Tomorrow at 12:30 PM, I have a doctor’s appointment which I have been apprehensive about for days. Oddly enough, I requested this test after I passed out and knocked my friend over like a bowling pin. It’s called an EEG test. I shall have many electrodes glued on to my head before lying down on this narrow bed and having all sorts of noises and lights bombarding my senses. I distinctly remember the last time I had this test, because the strobe light effect almost set off a seizure. This is something I am praying does not happen to me. I have had a few grand mal seizures in my lifetime, and the prospect of another one makes my stomach turn.

On the positive side, I will be allowed to have breakfast and take my morning meds. The downside of the morning is that I am not allowed to have any caffeine. I always have at least one cup of regular coffee to jumpstart the battery. I shall go over and have breakfast at Panera as usual, and have decaf coffee and a vanilla iced cinnamon roll. I can always count on those yummy pastries to put me in a good mood if I’m going to have a tough day.

On the downside of this test…, besides having glue in my hair, is that I was specifically instructed not to get my full allotment of sleep. It is suggested in the instruction paper for me to only have half of what I usually get. So, I’ll go to bed around 11 or 11:30 this evening, and wake up around 5 AM. That certainly is not my eight hours of beauty rest. Lol.

Even though I am dreading this test tomorrow, I know it must be done. We must ascertain why I passed out approximately two weeks ago. By Wednesday, I hope to have the results so that we can share them with you in our next blog entry. It is suppertime on this Sunday evening, and I am soon going to Panera to get something to eat with my last cup of regular coffee for a day and a half. 😦 Please everyone, think good thoughts for me tomorrow afternoon. It will be most appreciated.

Until Wednesday, when Rebecca is back to type and help me edit, take care as always, have a great rest of your weekend, love one another and happy reading.

Slightly under the weather and I’m about to build another Noah’s ark

Greetings, readers. Whoever said that you should take your medications at the same time every morning is most correct. I took my meds later than usual and although not by much, I could not listen to my morning music because I felt slightly seizure-ish. I’m fine now, but I hate it when my morning routine is interrupted. It is hard to describe how it feels. I remained completely awake and alert but my arms and hands didn’t do what I wanted them to do. I had to shut down the computer and rest.

On to the weather, prayers go out in advance to the folks in the Carolinas, who are about to be slammed by what is now called a “monster hurricane.” I will be donating later in the week to a GoFundMe page for hurricane relieve efforts, and I encourage you to do the same. In a few days, central Pennsylvania is forecast to get the outer ring of this humongous storm. This comes shortly on the heels of three straight days of hard rain from the remnants of the last hurricane, Gordon. Not to make light of the areas affected in the south, but we can’t take a whole lot more rain because of area flooding. This is after we had three solid weeks of rain in August. We had two weeks of drying out with a heat wave, before these latest storms. We don’t need more rain.

I watched quite a bit of week one pro football and was not impressed with my team, the Pittsburgh Steelers. Yes, readers, these Cleveland Browns are a better team than last year’s winless club, but come on … we should have beaten them by at least 14 points, despite the rain. This week we play the Kansas City Chiefs. If we are not careful, we will be 0-2. The Philadelphia Eagles squeaked out a close one after looking pathetic in the first half. Maybe I will become a Philadelphia Eagles fan. A lot of folks in our area have become New York Giants fans to watch former Penn State running back Saquon Barkley. I had an opportunity to do the same, but chose to watch the pathetic Steelers instead. Bad choice!

I’m taking tomorrow off for personal reasons, so I’m going to ask Rebecca to put up a new blog for everyone to enjoy tomorrow. Until next week, I bid you a wonderful weekend, please stay safe and dry, and as always, happy reading.

Top ten list of things I have difficulty or am unable to do because of seizures and my cerebral palsy

Greetings, readers. Today, we are going to have a top ten list, a long overdue top ten list, and I think I’ve found an interesting topic. It is jobs and hobbies that I have difficulty doing or am not allowed to do by law because of my health issues and medication. As almost all of you know, I have cerebral palsy, and every great once in a while one of the side effects of it is a petit mal seizure. There are many professions I dreamt of doing and would have loved to do but at age 16, when the first seizure hit, those doors were slammed shut. Those professions will be featured in choices two and one. Okay, so here we go, let’s start it off.

#10. Circus performer. [Now, I know some of you are thinking, why did this even make the list. I’ve never dreamt of being a circus performer; however, with my bad balance due to my CP and that minute risk of a seizure, anything like a trapeze artist or a high wire act is absolutely out of the question. I could be a clown or some other act on the ground, but really the whole circus thing really wouldn’t appeal to me.]

#9. Mountain climber. [Again, I have absolutely no desire to go climb a mountain, but if I did, it would be one of the most unsafe hobbies I could try. You need two strong hands to grab on to the rocks; I only have one strong hand.]

#8. City high-rise window washer. [If I lived in New York City or Los Angeles, that could be a job that I could try, but I think my bad balance and fear of heights would petrify me so much that I would freeze in one spot and not be able to move. Now I know there is harness equipment to keep you from falling to the ground, but I don’t think that would be enough to overcome the blind panic.]

#7. Police officer. [A police officer has to be strong, well-coordinated, and able to run fast. I am none of those things. Oh, I could drive the police car, no problem, but if we were chasing someone in a car at 80 miles an hour, my bad coordination would come in to play and I would most likely wrap the squad car around a light pole. It would be a fun job, but … no, not for me.]

#6. Firefighter. [As a child I loved the show Emergency!, and later the short-lived series Code Red wasn’t bad either. It made me dream of wanting to be a firefighter. I’m sure I could hold the hose on the first floor, but carrying heavy things just isn’t going to happen. I would tip over and fall, or drop the heavy piece of equipment or person. Not good.]

#5. Drive a train. [I love my train simulator game, and I wonder what it would have been like to drive one in real life. My daily medication regiment makes that dream impossible. ]

#4. Play professional sports. [When I was a child, most boys, myself included, dreamt of playing sports. Ah, the dream of scoring the winning touchdown in the Super Bowl, or the game winning hit in game seven of the World Series. Now, I don’t mind telling you, I was a pretty fair Nerf football quarterback, but as far as going out for the high school team, forget about it. I was not strong enough, big enough, or coordinated enough.]

#3. Do all tasks of my job and do them fast. [At my fast food job, there are a few jobs I can’t do, like the take out window, because the drink lids are different from the coffee lids, and I will tend to spill the drinks when my shaking left hand gets in the way of my firm right hand. That tends to make my manager an unhappy camper if I goof up and spill a drink. I take pride in getting thinks correct. That means at the register I will take a couple of extra seconds with each customer. People have rewarded me through good reviews for my extra effort. If you want speed and accuracy, well I can’t count change as fast as anyone else. I might be one of their friendliest cashiers, but I am in no way the quickest. Every day I do get a little bit better, but with these fingers, I’ll only be able to get just so fast. I have to remember to stay within myself, and be the best me that I can be. What else can anybody ask of me.]

#2. Truck driver. [The thought of driving down the interstate in a big-rig filled my dreams many times, especially after watching Smokey and the Bandit thirteen consecutive Friday evenings at the movie theater. Yes, the movies were only $2 back then. When my seizures began, again there went that employment opportunity. I doubt highly that any trucking company would hire anyone with seizures and who is medicated to the point where at the end of the day his favorite word is nap. I guess I’ll just have to stick to playing Euro Truck Simulator 2 for my gaming channel.]

#1. Commercial airline pilot. [This was my big dream as a child. I loved airplanes and still do. I was in awe in big airports. Everything jumbo jet fascinated me. I wanted to fly for TWA or Pan Am. And again, then the seizures hit. Not to be too redundant, but no airline in their right mind would hire someone on four different types of seizure medications. Plus, with my weakness in my left side, yes I could lift the yoke up and get the plane to fly, however, if the hydraulics failed, I know right now I would not have the strength in the arms to keep that aluminum bird flying straight and level.]

Well, there you have it, the long overdue top ten list for today. I’m planning on taking a personal day tomorrow, so Rebecca will do the entry for Thursday. Until next time, have a great weekend, take care, and as always, happy reading.

I love my life, but not today

Greetings, readers. It has been a very frustrating morning but the worst is over. A simple task which should have taken five minutes took nearly an hour. Here’s how it all went down.

I noticed this morning that I needed to call the pharmacy and order a few prescriptions. The first three weren’t a problem. My one seizure med was the one that hit the snag. They said I had already picked that one up last week. Where was it? I had lost it somewhere. We went through four months of empty pharmacy bags and receipts and it wasn’t here. Panic time. I opened my bag with the current med bottles to confirm I didn’t have it, and there it was. Phew. But then I couldn’t remember the name of the med I did need to order. I know I take four seizure meds and after all this time their names should be burned into my brain. One of them wasn’t. Poor Rebecca had to sit here while we went through empty bags looking for that one empty ‘script bottle. Oh, joy, oh, bliss. Yes, she calls herself my assistant, but I think today she went over and above the call of duty. Thanks go to Rebecca. I got the name of the med and was able to order it from the pharmacy. My usual system of putting newly purchased meds in the current meds bag and of making a mental note for which meds are low and need to be called in that day, has worked perfectly for me for a long time, but today it failed.

We did get the problem sorted out and this afternoon I can pick up my new ‘scripts. But dang blast it, it really makes me nuts when the simplest of tasks takes way longer than it should. I know, I know, this happens to everybody from time to time, it just seems like it happens to me more than it should.

After about 40 minutes of what I would call a waste, we were able to begin my blog entry for the day. I was going to blog on a completely different topic, a RIP for my friend and neighbor Rita. I may still do that topic next week, especially if I can get her daughter’s permission to use Rita’s full name.

My friend’s death has hit me harder than I ever expected. Because of a language barrier (she was Russian) we did not have long conversations, though she did speak some English. It was more or less the daily pleasantries that we could exchange while passing in the hallways or outside the building. I think the suddenness of her death is what is effecting me the most. She is here one minute and gone mere hours later. It has made me think of my own mortality, not that I think I will die tomorrow, but it does point out that one never knows. We can be gone in the blink of an eye.

Rebecca and I will be in the office next week as usual on Wednesday and Thursday with two more interesting blog entries. If I get permission from Rita’s daughter to go into more detail, I shall on Wednesday. If not, I’ll choose another topic.

Finally, the Penn State Nittany Lion football team gave a valiant effort in the Rose Bowl but came up just short against the University of Southern California. This was the highest scoring Rose Bowl in history and the most exciting one that I have ever seen. Kudos to both teams on a great season.

Until next week, have a great weekend, take care, and happy reading.

Brrr, that was cold!

Greetings, readers. Today my hour at Panera came to an abrupt halt when, while talking to my girlfriend and gesturing with my hands, I knocked my full cup of cold water all over my lap. To most, that would just be an annoyance. To someone like me though, who suffers from a slight nervous condition and has a history of seizures, any sudden change in body temperature could cause problems.

Traci didn’t know what to do as I just sat there trying to catch my breath. It is a terrible feeling to know that you are sitting in a restaurant in soaking wet pants and can’t do anything quickly to make yourself feel better. I would have given anything for a warm-air hand dryer in the men’s bathroom. No such luck.

I told Traci that I was going to go outside and sit in the sunshine while I waited for Rebecca. It did feel good and the sun dried me out a wee bit. I felt bad leaving Traci there by herself, but she insisted that I go outside and warm up.

I was lucky because the temperature was warm but the humidity was low. With a light breeze, it was quite comfortable sitting there on the bench. I’m very thankful it wasn’t a rainy afternoon.

Before meeting my accountant today, I had to come up to the apartment/office, change, and make sure that we didn’t forget anything before the meeting time. I must admit to you that my morning drenching did put me in a slightly surly mood, but I am feeling much better now. The meeting is over, the blog entry is being written, and all appointments have been changed until tomorrow. The best news of all is that I had no ill effects from Panera’s version of Niagara Falls.

My nail appointment has been moved until tomorrow for personal reasons and actually that suits me better. After Traci returns from an outing of her own, I might invite her up for decaf or go down to her place for a visit.

Well, there is my day. I am learning to take mild upsets with a grain of salt. Even with the water faux pas, I am going to have a good day. I have charged up my PS3 controller, and will play a little baseball or football until coffee hour.

Until Friday, take care, have a great day, and happy reading.

This morning I had a minor health issue while playing my new video game

Greetings, readers. I’ve never enjoyed talking about my cerebral palsy and all of its side effects. But this morning something happened which really had me concerned. I had slept in a wee bit and had taken my meds later than usual. I then settled down with some coffee for a few hours of my new game, WWE2k16. After the first 40 minutes, even with that annoying screen shake toggled off, I felt a seizure coming on. Everything started to go black, I felt shaky, and I instinctively grabbed both chair arms and held on for dear life. It didn’t last very long, I must say, since I was able to ward off the actual seizure. I immediately turned the game off, shut off all the lights in my apartment, and did what I do best, took a nap.

When I awakened at 11:15, all was normal once again. I’m really going to have to watch myself when playing this game. I can play MLB baseball indefinitely with no issues. I think in this wrestling game, the flashing lights of the arena and all the simulated pyrotechnics are just a little bit too much. From now on, I’ll play for an hour or so and then take a break. I am really enjoying this game and want to get better at it, but to do that I have to play. It is frustrating when I have to stop all the time because of my condition.

I first saw this game on YouTube, being played by a gamer who calls himself CMPuLs3 (pronounced c.m. pulse). His channel is excellent and his wrestling videos are introd by the actual WWE champion, Seth Rollins. Way cool! I want to thank CMPuLs3 for getting me into this game and making super cool videos, especially the James Falcon series.

I’ve written to this person on Facebook, asking him for any help on how to play the game for people with bad hands. Luckily, and to my surprise, the game will play computer versus computer, so I can watch and at least learn the moves. Next, I need to know how to do them, quickly enough. I’ve played four matches now. I am 0-4, with an average losing time of 8 seconds.

How cool is this? I created my own character called Thunderbolt Jimmy Storm, paired him with Stone Cold Steve Austin, and we are now a tag team tentatively called The New Foundation, working our way up the ranks to hopefully take the title.

Lastly, it is a rainy day here in State College and I might have to keep the gaming machine off. That is probably a good idea considering what happened this morning.

Until Wednesday, when we’ll be back to a normal week, take care, have a great weekend, and happy reading.

Mud

Greetings, readers. As I’ve mentioned before, there are times in my life when I feel like I’m stuck in the mud. I just can’t get into a complete morning ’til evening routine. It is true that my morning routine is pretty well established, but once noon-time rolls around, all bets are off. I only work with Rebecca Wednesday through Friday. The weekend, Monday and Tuesday are my opportunities to write, clean the apartment, and have some me time. What I must do if I am going to continue to be a writer is take advantage of the early week and actually write.

I’ve sat at the computer before with a word document open, but no great ideas seem to take form. One time I started a short story, and the next day I edited it and realized it was total crap. I’ve been told by Rebecca never to throw any writing away, but sometimes I just cannot help myself. I know it’s garbage because what I read looked and felt forced. When I know that my writing is forced, the only place it can be put is the clunker file.

Another reason I think I’m stuck in the mud happened just last week. Rebecca was reading out loud a story I had dictated a year or two ago and I thought to myself, boy this is pretty good. Then to my shock I realized I can’t write like that anymore. Yes, my medications have been proven to dampen my brain to keep my seizures in check. I’m almost positive that this is what is affecting my creativity. I’ve got a dilemma. Obviously I don’t want seizures, but I don’t want what I call oatmeal brain either.

Between now and early March, when my best friend is coming for a visit, I’m going to tinker around with daily schedules and routines for writing. After his visit, hopefully with that routine in place, I’m going to begin to write with a vengeance. I want to have something to show for the year before camp time rolls around in August.

Lastly, you could say the cold weather is stuck in the mud, too. We’ve been having an arctic blast for a couple of weeks. The strange thing is I’m getting used to it. As long as there is no snow or ice, I suppose I can handle it.

Until Friday, keep warm, good luck with all of your endeavors, and, as always, happy reading.