Tag Archives: morbid fascination

Too much of a good thing is a bad thing

Greetings, readers. I’ve been watching reruns of Forensic Files on YouTube the last several evenings and have found one distressing thing. Although it is a marvelous program, that shows how criminals can be apprehended and convicted by forensic evidence, which I love, the episodes are depressing. If it’s not a murder, it’s rape, torture, kidnapping, or something else that is grizzly. The other evening I watched twelve straight episodes and went to bed feeling like crap. My psychologist will have to hit me on the wrist with a wet noodle.

I don’t know if this is a form of self-punishment or abuse, but something psychological is going on. This is not the first time I have done this type of behavior. I can sit for hours on end and watch the best of YouTube marriage proposals, service men and women surprising their loved one, and all kinds of tear-jerking events. I suppose I get some entertainment out of it, but I just basically get depressed because of it. That much is emotional overload.

What to do, what to do? My doctor will have her work cut out for her. She’ll probably suggest watching these things in small numbers or perhaps not at all. With my morbid fascination with air plane disasters, crimes, death, and carnage, there must be some underlying reason why I am drawn to such things.

This morning, before Rebecca came to work, I purposely stayed at home, made my coffee in my Keurig, and played a game on my PS3. Nothing depressing about playing MLB15 The Show.

I’m sure when this blog entry will be posted to Facebook and Twitter, my family and friends will offer advice on how to help me. That will be most appreciated. For the most part, I’m feeling better in years past. I’m keeping to my early morning schedule, and seem to be getting a lot more done. I just have a few rough edges to work out and I will be a happy person around the clock.

Can anybody really be a happy person around the clock? I fully understand the answer is no. But I hope to be one of the people who can be cheerful, pleasant, and thankful about 95% of the time.

Before closing, welcome back Rebecca, missed you. The blog entries suffered. {From Rebecca: I missed you and being at work, too. *waving* Hi, readers!}

Until Friday, when I hope to have a top ten list ready to go, take care, have a good day, and happy reading.

A Morbid Facsination

For many years I have been fascinated, sometimes to a morbid extent, with tragedies. Some which I have studied via reading materials, films, and documentaries are the sinking of the Titanic, the events of 9/11, and air tragedies, including TWA 800 and Pan Am 103.

I have thought many times, why should I have such a morbid fascination with such things which involve people’s suffering? I suppose in a way that it is human nature. Every time someone is out on a window ledge, a crowd gathers around to see if that person will jump or get saved. Now I’m not a jumper watcher; my fascination has always been aircraft.

As mentioned in the last blog entry just briefly, I have been watching episodes of a show called Air Crash Investigation. It documents numerous air tragedies over the years, some with favorable outcomes, and others disastrous.

I’m not certain if it is knowledge I seek or whether I am simply trying to determine what I would do differently. How would I have prevented the crash or accident? I know for a fact that studying the Titanic documentation, the one thing I would not have done would be to put the engines into reverse, slowing down the reaction time. For those of you who have read my blog post about Air Florida Flight 90, I believe that you’ll agree that several mistakes were made causing the crash of that Boeing 737. It seemed that with that particular incident that the more I watched and learned, the angrier I became. The incident that got me the angriest, however, was Pan Am 103.

Pan Am 103 was a flight that on December 21, 1988 was heading home to New York from London, England. A bomb brought that aircraft down over Lockerbie Scotland, killing everyone on board and many on the ground. Later, I found out that Pan Am knew about a bomb threat to that specific flight, told some people, but did not give everyone the option of boarding or not boarding the flight.

TWA 800 took off from New York heading for Europe Paris, France one fateful evening and exploded at 24,000 feet. The nose section detached leaving both pieces to fall to the burning water with everyone still in the plane. No survivors. Months later it was determined that a bomb did not bring it down, but simply faulty wiring near the center gas tank of the more than 20-year-old 747.

Back to my original point of my personal morbid fascination with these stories. When watching these documentaries, I suppose I am not only seeking knowledge but the junior private investigator in me comes out. I just want to understand it from every angle – the whys, the hows, the whens, the conditions leading up to these events. Perhaps in my 20s I should have gone to work for the National Transportation Safety Board. When my health failed and my dream of being a pilot were dashed, then perhaps I could have helped to keep planes safe by working for the NTSB.

Just the other day I read an on-line article about the cruise ship which sank off the Italian coast. The captain abandoned ship and refused orders to go back to it, which I find to be a cowardly act.

Is this all just me wishing knowledge, or is it truly a morbid fascination with death and destruction and the suffering of others? I’ve asked myself that question many times. Why don’t I just watch cartoons and comedy shows? I tell myself, that’s a great idea. But I always seem to be drawn back to Air Crash Investigation or Seconds from Disaster. Over the coming weeks and months I shall think long and hard on this and if I figure it out, I shall share my conclusions.

Until next time.