Tag Archives: holiday

Top ten list of things I’ll love about being married again

Greetings, readers. In June of 2018, I plan on tying the knot for the second time. My fiancé Traci and I are enjoying being engaged and our relationship is progressing nicely. There are a few bumps in the road as with any couple, but I feel we can work those out well before the big day. Here’s a top ten list of things I’ll love about being married again, in no particular order.

#10. Making decisions about vacations together. [Both of us hope to, at some point, take a cruise together. There are websites where good deals are on offer. A nice five to seven-day cruise to the Bahamas and back would be a lovely introduction for Traci to be on a cruise ship. I’ve been on them twice.]

#9. Companionship on a full-time basis. [I am so used to being able to do whatever I want to do whenever I want to do it. As much as I enjoy this, there is a nice feeling of going to bed together, seeing each other the first and the last thing of each day, taking long walks, and enjoying stimulating conversation.]

#8. Partner for the tough times. [Undoubtedly, there will be tough times now and then where one of us will have to rely on the other. And also to discuss what is bothering the person and allowing the other to help. We can’t be so proud that we can think we can solve our problems by ourselves. In fact, having a partner means that we are not alone when facing life’s challenges.]

#7. Inspiring each other. [We have already begun to do this, even before the wedding. Both Traci and I have personal issues to overcome. We both egg each other on and are there for support of the other when times get tough or we have a setback. We have each other’s back.]

#6. Holiday visits with family. [For the last several years, I have celebrated holidays either by myself or have taken a trip to New Jersey to be with David’s family. Now we have the opportunity to spend time with Traci’s family and friends, as well as my buddy and brother’s family. This also affords the chance, if the opportunity arises, to have both families present on occasion, i.e. the wedding and reception.]

#5. Making up after a fight. [Neither of us like to fight, but it is inevitable that in close quarters we will disagree on something from time to time. I expect all of our fights to be verbal since I was raised to not put an unloving hand on a woman. I expect after all is said and done and the anger vented, we will come to a solution to our issue and make up. That is the part I will look forward to in this situation. Will I pick a fight just to make up? No. Although I’ve heard some people do.]

#4. Growth of relationship in close quarters. [At present, Traci and I only see one another when we eat out, run errands, or when we visit each other at her apartment or mine for coffee. When we are married, we will live under one roof and we will have to learn to accept each other’s quarks and habits. It shouldn’t be too difficult to do if we keep the lines of communications open and share our feelings.]

#3. Intimacy. [I shall admit to you, my readers, I was never one of those teenagers who had sex in high school. I was shy and awkward and so sex and intimacy came much later in my life. I’ve been divorced now for over ten years and have not had a serious girlfriend before Traci. So I am looking forward to making strides in our intimacy.]

#2. Sharing life stories and memories. [I know I have a gazillion stories from my childhood, and years with Dave, that can make Traci laugh and lift her spirits. People say laughter is the best medicine. She can also make me laugh, she has a good sense of humor. I’ll admit sometimes I can’t tell when she is kidding. LOL.]

#1. The wedding reception. [Every now and then, both families will be under one roof for a social occasion. The first one will be our wedding reception. We will be sending out the save-the-date magnets for people’s refrigerators approximately six months prior the wedding. With the reception that evening, both families will mingle. I see everyone getting along splendidly. Dave’s whole family adores Traci, and Traci’s sister Roni always gives me a big hug too when Traci and I are leaving our coffee outings.]

There is my top ten list of things I’ll love about being married. If anyone would like to add some that they experienced, please leave a comment here or on my Facebook page.

Next week, Rebecca will be here on Wednesday and my schedule for Thursday is still up in the air. If we don’t work that day, one of us will put the Thursday blog up so there will be two next week.

Until then, have a super-duper weekend, take care, and happy reading.

From Rebecca: Thanksgiving and my mom Betty Lee

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the United States, the holiday where we celebrate the gathering of Pilgrims and Native Americans to give thanks for friendship and abundance. Traditionally we celebrate it with a big meal that we eat with as many family members as possible, where we say what we are thankful for, and then after the meal we fall asleep will watching football on television. The holiday is about family, tradition, gratitude, and food.

It was one of my mother’s favorite holidays. Betty Lee was big on counting your blessings, but she also really loved that every few years her birthday was the same day as Thanksgiving. Last Sunday I had conversations about her with my father and with my sisters. She passed away almost four years ago, and we are thinking about her a lot. We aren’t going to be all together this year, instead we are having small gatherings in our own homes. I never realized how much she and my step-father did to get us together for the holidays and birthdays until she passed away. Without her calling with the time, place, and expectation to be there for family get-togethers, we just don’t get many of them arranged anymore. We do see and talk to each other a lot, so that is good. Maybe the big meal together is more for families that are far apart from one another. We are blessed to live as close as we do. We are not as close as we would like to be my step-father, but we try to keep in touch as much as we can.

My mom and step-father, when they were still in good health, loved going places and talking to people. In restaurants they knew the servers and managers, in banks they knew the tellers, and in grocery stores they knew many of the cashiers. They really liked knowing about other people and had a wide circle of friends and acquaintances. If someone had trouble and needed help, my mom and step-father would give that help if they could. Mom loved keeping in contact with people on the internet, especially Facebook. My sister Marjorie has inherited these traits. She also likes keeping up with a wide circle of friends on the internet. When I go to restaurants with her, she knows all the servers and managers. They stop by the table for a minute on the way by to chat with her and she cares about many of them. At one place, she is such friends with a few of the servers that for a while she was giving them rides to and from work when they had trouble with transportation. Mom would be so proud of Marjorie.

Mom also spent her life exploring her spiritual path, inner truth, and how to live her faith. She sometimes explored paths that were different from those her family, and sometimes society, were following, like A Course in Miracles. She followed her own sense of inner right and wrong, while accepting that others had different views. My sister Jennifer also explores her inner spiritual truth and how to live her faith. She participates in her church and struggles with how to follow her path and God’s plan for her. Her father, mother, and sisters are not a part of her church and that faith, but she is true to herself by choosing to be there. She also uses her artistic skills to help others who are in pain because of tragic loss. Mom would be so proud of Jennifer.

I am not sure what I share with Mom, other a love of books, but I know that her life on earth flows through us and with us into the world. I am so thankful that she was my mom. It is one of the things I am grateful for this Thanksgiving, along with my dad, sisters, step-father, nephews, niece, brother-in-law, husband, mother-in-law, my friend Joe, and my other friends. Mom was a big believer in going around the Thanksgiving meal table and saying our list of what we are thankful for each year.

I know there are people who do not celebrate Thanksgiving the same way, and see it in light of the eventual oppression of the Native people of this land by the European people. I am aware that the Natives got the short end of every deal they made with the people and nation that followed the help that tribe gave the Pilgrims that first pivotal year. But I love the spirit of two different groups gathering together to celebrate friendship, generosity, and achievement. The Pilgrims had lost so many in the ocean crossing and the first devastating winter. Then, with help, they learned to live off the land and grow crops in their new home. They had food and skills to go into another winter from a better position. In gratitude, they invited their teachers to a feast, to celebrate having an abundance to share. We honor that meal with our holiday.

So if you are in the United States and participate in Thanksgiving, may you have a good meal and great company. If you don’t celebrate the holiday, may you still have many blessings to give thanks for this year. Happy Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving is a comin’

Greetings, readers. Tomorrow begins my favorite time of the year; the holiday season. Rebecca and I were talking earlier and she got a chuckle that I have my whole day planned already. I’ll be watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade from 9:00 until noon, dinner at 1:00, and football after that. At exactly noon, when Santa Claus turns right at 34th street, it will be time for me to think about decorating the apartment and getting into that Christmas frame of mind.

I know it is not politically correct to say Merry Christmas, but when I was a youth in the early 70s, the generic “happy holidays” was just starting and had not caught on yet. More times than not, I will say happy holidays to people just to be safe and not offend anyone. But, being Roman Catholic, Merry Christmas was what I heard as a child; it is what I knew. As a lot of my regular blog readers know, I am a very sentimental person; I had a very wonderful childhood, and enjoy looking back on it.

On to some other news, my two writing projects are going well … finally. Yay to that. When I see Darren next on December 12th, I’m certain I shall have lots to give him to work on. I imagine that Rebecca will be happy, because she will have more to edit. Right now working feels good.

Let me get you up to date on some family members. This past Friday I saw my cousins Ed and Maria, and we had a lovely dinner at the Tavern restaurant. They came down for the day so that Maria could check out Penn State. My Godmother is doing better, thank goodness, but not quite well enough to have company. Best friend Dave and clan will be home for Thanksgiving, and will be enjoying the day at a relative’s house nearby.

Yes, I expect in a week or so, this apartment will look lively with lights, and Christmas Carols will be playing on my computer or on one of the local radio stations. And on December 24th, the Christmas light ride will be renewed, thanks to something called Zipcar. I will explain that service in my next blog entry.

So, until Friday, I hope everyone will have a wonderful Thanksgiving and stay safe if you are traveling; keep an eye out for the weather. Take care and happy reading.

My Easter gift

Greetings, readers. This past Easter Sunday I went back to church for the first time in far too long. It felt nice, but not having a family there I had a sense of being alone. I arrived at the Penn State campus church, Pasquerilla Spiritual Center, later than I wanted to and was afraid I wasn’t going to be able to get a seat. To my surprise, there were five seats left on the right side of the front row. I grabbed the one on the end.

As I was sitting there waiting for Mass to begin, a sad feeling came over me and I began to miss my mother. Years ago, she and I attended daily Mass. After she passed away, I continued to go for a short while but something didn’t feel right. I felt alone. That is when I made one of my poorest life decisions. Instead of fighting through my emotions, I simply stopped going to church. Not good.

Right before the service was to begin, a very nice family, I didn’t ask their names, began to take the last few remaining seats around me. The lady asked me if I would mind keeping an eye on her kids while she sat behind me. I, of course, said sure, why not? As the service began, the lonely feeling went away. At first I thought it was because I was busy listening to the lectors, the singing of the hymns, and the priest giving his sermon. But as time went by I realized it was much more than that. I think the Lord worked a little bit of magic that day. He put a big family right around someone who desperately did not want to be there alone. When I came to that realization, I had trouble containing my emotions for a moment.

After Mass was over, I let the lady know what had happened and thanked her for letting me keep an eye on her boys. I told her that she didn’t know how much it meant to me to be with a family on that particular Easter day; my first time back to church in three years.

I am vowing to go to church every Sunday from now on. Will I succeed in this endeavor? Oh, probably not. As long as I make the effort to go to as many Sundays as I can, I think that will be a great first step toward getting back to my Catholic religion.

On Friday, I will have a top ten list for Rebecca, hopefully already made, so that we can quickly post it and move on to other Friday work. So until then, take care, have a great week, and happy reading.

Here’s a little something about me

Hi there everyone. Today my friend, and writing assistant, Rebecca and I more or less figured out the basics of WordPress. There is still a lot to be learned and I think that each day we’ll learn a little more. On a writing note, a new story was created today in first draft form for the second installment of Bear Spring Camps stories.

Here in Central Pennsylvania the cold weather has set in and I find it cozy to stay inside with the heater on and write. My kitty cat Keekee is always nearby, mostly sleeping. She is a domestic longhair with calico colors. She’s five and she’s my buddy.

Just a little bit more about me. I was born in Pittsburgh, moved to State College in 1968 when I was three. I began writing in my 20s and have loved it ever since. I’ve taken stabs at screenplay writing, play writing, and short stories. I have one play under my belt, titled Kimberly, which had a stage reading at a local theatre about an hour away. Response was positive.

With the work week winding down, I will make every effort to post next Wednesday.

Happy New Year to all and take care.