Tag Archives: caffeine

I am very nervous about my appointment with my doctor tomorrow

Greetings, readers. Tomorrow at 12:30 PM, I have a doctor’s appointment which I have been apprehensive about for days. Oddly enough, I requested this test after I passed out and knocked my friend over like a bowling pin. It’s called an EEG test. I shall have many electrodes glued on to my head before lying down on this narrow bed and having all sorts of noises and lights bombarding my senses. I distinctly remember the last time I had this test, because the strobe light effect almost set off a seizure. This is something I am praying does not happen to me. I have had a few grand mal seizures in my lifetime, and the prospect of another one makes my stomach turn.

On the positive side, I will be allowed to have breakfast and take my morning meds. The downside of the morning is that I am not allowed to have any caffeine. I always have at least one cup of regular coffee to jumpstart the battery. I shall go over and have breakfast at Panera as usual, and have decaf coffee and a vanilla iced cinnamon roll. I can always count on those yummy pastries to put me in a good mood if I’m going to have a tough day.

On the downside of this test…, besides having glue in my hair, is that I was specifically instructed not to get my full allotment of sleep. It is suggested in the instruction paper for me to only have half of what I usually get. So, I’ll go to bed around 11 or 11:30 this evening, and wake up around 5 AM. That certainly is not my eight hours of beauty rest. Lol.

Even though I am dreading this test tomorrow, I know it must be done. We must ascertain why I passed out approximately two weeks ago. By Wednesday, I hope to have the results so that we can share them with you in our next blog entry. It is suppertime on this Sunday evening, and I am soon going to Panera to get something to eat with my last cup of regular coffee for a day and a half. 😦 Please everyone, think good thoughts for me tomorrow afternoon. It will be most appreciated.

Until Wednesday, when Rebecca is back to type and help me edit, take care as always, have a great rest of your weekend, love one another and happy reading.

To learn or not to learn

Greetings, readers. After many weeks of contemplating whether or not to go back and finish college, I am now leaning towards not. At least not full-time. I know this decision follows my pattern of never finishing anything. But after discussing the topic with my accountant today, we came to the realization that we would probably not make up the $80,000 or $90,000 that it would cost, in the ten years that I would have left to work. Yes, folks, I would be 55 or so by the time I was done. I was all gung-ho for this project a couple of weeks ago, and now once again I am depressed.

An alternative would be to go part-time, taking one or two classes per semester. That would drag it out even longer, but it would be easier on me and with the money. I have three possible majors in mind: Marketing to help me sell the books I already have; Writing to help me write more books; or Psychology in honor of my mother who was a psychologist. The first step will be to see what semester I take the first class in, in August or perhaps in January. The later semester start would give me time to get back from camp, possibly get that job at Panera, and settle in to the new year’s routine. Maybe the job will be enough to make me feel like I am a contributor in life.

Did I really want to finish college? It would have done wonders for my self-esteem and it might have opened up a career or two. Certainly it would have helped me with my writing. I’ve not ruled it in, but I’ve not ruled it out. At age 51, with a brain that sometimes acts like it is in oatmeal, I guess the question is, could I do it? Could I succeed? I guess I wouldn’t know unless I tried, would I? Those who don’t try, don’t get anything in life. Those who do try, sometimes fail, but are usually rewarded.

Besides being a bit bummed out about the whole college idea, I am currently suffering from mild caffeine withdrawals (pardon my yawn). I have had only decaf today and I missed my time at Panera. I’m sure I’ll go over this afternoon, but because of doctor’s orders I am drinking less caffeine and more water. I’m not exactly a happy camper. Not to jinx myself, but at least I don’t have a splitting headache. Though, I do admit that the experiment is working and the physical issues I was having are dramatically reduced.

For those of you who might be interested, my YouTube vlog is up and running. It is called the Joe Kockelmans Show and the only problem about it is that if I sing with music behind me, the video is blocked in 9/10ths of the world. My point on that is this: yes, I understand about copyright law, but I am not trying to sell it, and I am definitely not the Beatles or KISS. No one will confuse me for those bands or any others that I sing with. There must be some way around that snafu. Time will tell.

Until Friday, take care, have a great couple of days, and happy reading.